March 5, 2011

Who Am I?

I have so much to say. But the words just aren't coming to me... Today has been awful. The rain doesn't help much. I think I have cried as much as it has rained. I love my life. But I think I'm ruining it. I don't know what has happened to me over the last 3 years. Yes, I've had 2 kids, got married, and moved out into the real world. But what has made me feel this way? Its like something dark has consumed me on the inside. I have no patience. Everything makes me mad. Some days I'm just sad. I want to scream at the top of my lungs instead of talking calmly. I don't like who I am now, but I don't know how to change back to the sweet, care free, outgoing me. Where is that person?? And how do I get this blackness out of me?? I think I know the answer, but for some reason, the devil has that grip on me. And its a hard grip.

ugh. I'm hoping this girl's night will help relieve some stress. Today has sucked.

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